Saturday, February 19, 2011

Ok, it's time to get down to it. I've been futzing around other blogs for the last hour kind of trying to avoid writing my own post.  Thankfully, I have a Dear Sister who will not rest until I have dragged every single some at least one emotion up from the dregs of my heart so she can see how I'm really doing. (I guess 10 - 15 phone calls a week back and forth between us isn't convincing enough.)

I don't want to get into too much about this, but Hot Stuff and I have separated. (Let's keep this off facebook, shall we? Private stuff for Blogger, only.) At first, things were back and forth from angry to amicable.  Right now, we are amicable.  So amicable, as a matter of fact, that when I got some wisdom teeth removed on Wednesday afternoon, he volunteered to watch the kids and keep an eye on me so I didn't die. (Just so you don't think I am a giant wimp, I had three teeth removed under general anesthetic. Being under GA means you are not allowed to be left alone for the first 24 hrs after surgery, should you decide to lock yourself in the bathroom and pass out.. or fall down the stairs. Somehow, I managed to avoid both!)

Post surgery, my face looked like I got dragged behind a car for a few blocks. Thanks to the two bottom wisdom teeth, which my dental surgeon referred to as, "Oh! Ho! Ho! They were some nasty bastards!" I had lots of swelling, and now have bruising and a sexy little patch of busted up skin on the corner of my mouth that resembles an eruption of gonosyphiherpelaids. I would have taken a picture, but I couldn't remember where I put the camera. Blame the narcotics.

So there I was, doped up on Emcat (Tylenol #3 without the caffeine), being very well taken care of by my separated spouse. It was nice.  And weird. But very nice, none the less. It doesn't change my plans (to move out at the end of the month), but in him I think I saw a glimmer of a person that I would definitely want to be married to, should the person that I saw this last couple of days truly be the person that my spouse is changing into.

Either way, and this is the biggie, I am prepared to continue on my way. Making a life for myself where my happiness is not even a little dependent on someone else.


  1. Since you asked, I'm in Toronto and I - since I'm reading your archives - suspect you are in Alberta. I've been where you are and it sucks. It'll get better. It'll also get worse. I have no wisdom and I certainly won't offer any platitudes.

  2. Aw hon. Been there. If it's right for you to find your ways back together, then it will happen. If not...well, I know from experience that it sucks, but it is most definitely survivable. Even more than that.

    I'll be keeping you on my mind. (HUGS)

  3. Well dam it. I had that "feeling" this might be the situation for you but was hoping I was wrong. Such a shitty place to be and trust me, I've been there, done that. All I can tell you is, hang in there. It DOES get better! And sorry to hear about the wisdom teeth but hey, sounds like you got some good drugs so that's good news, right?! Thinking of you!

  4. I know you are okay though but your blogs always contain some humour and I always find myself smiling. So for basically my own selfishness, that's why I wanted you to write. No worries, its totally off facebook - its your story to tell and who you choose to tell is your business.

  5. My heart goes out to you. Take care of yourself and yours.

  6. Hi there. Love the blog.

    I've been through a separation, actually will be a divorce as soon as we can afford it. I'm also looking into going back to school to be an LPN.

    Hang in there!!


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