Thursday, April 30, 2009

Conversations with a 4 Year Old

Hurricane: "Mom, do dogs dig for bones?"

Me: "Yes, they do."

Hurricane: "Are they paleontologists?"

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Lookin Good & Feelin Fine

Well the lookin good part is this: I have had 3 kids in less than 4 years and my body looks like hell. Cankles? Check. Jiggly everything, especially jiggly butt? Check. Boobs heading south? Check. So far, I am down a pound for this week and I still have until Friday before I weigh in for the week. Score!! I think the biggest thing this week is not cheating on my meal plan every frickin day. We still have Easter chocolate in the house and, of course, it's on dirt cheap at the grocery store, so I inevitably load up with the rationalization of: "Hot Stuff will eat this. Pffft, I don't even want chocolate." What a LIE. Of course I'm going to eat the damn chocolate. I have an addiction to it. Who do I think I am kidding? Honestly.

The feelin fine part is even better: further to my last post about what the heck to do to about the sorry state of the world, I put some serious thought into what I thought would make the biggest difference and where I would get the biggest bang for my buck.

I signed up to sponsor a child through Plan Canada. (Formerly Foster Parents Plan.)

Specifically, I sponsored a girl, but everything else I left as "most needed" as in, age, country, region, etc. I chose to sponsor a girl because I believe that opportunities for education just don't exist for girls in third-world countries. Not to say that boys and young men aren't important. They most certainly are. My understanding, though, is that boys are always educated before girls. I believe that if you educate a young woman, you are educating every single one of her children, whom, in turn, will educate their children. I have absolutely nothing scientific to back that up. It is just what I believe.

Plan Canada has been around for a zillion years, they are Canadian, and I trust them. They state on the website that they pool money for the communities they pick, as opposed to spending one sponsorship on one child. I will get a picture and a story about one of the girls in the community, and I can even send her letters and gifts!! I am quite excited to find out my girl's story. I wonder how old she'll be. Or what her dreams are. Can't wait!

If you're interested, the website is:

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Happy Little Life

The truth of it is, I don't want to travel to Europe or have great and fantastic adventures. Right now, I am happy to have my little house, with my little family, my little people, and a whole bunch of love. Sure, I wouldn't turn down tickets to say, Hawaii, or say, Las Vegas, but I won't be auditioning for The Amazing Race soon. Or ever. I do see what is happening in the rest of the world; war, violence, abject poverty, starvation, famine, genocide, sickness, the list goes on. It is because I see what goes on that I want to just have my happy little life. I definitely don't have my head buried in the sand.

Well, ok, let me beat you to it and call myself on my bullsh*t. Like most of the First World, if it's not happening right in front of me, then it doesn't affect my life. You start to think about what is happening in other less fortunate countries, and the problem seems so immense that where do you even start? There is only so much money a person in this economy (and boy are we feeling this downturn) can give to charity. Who has time for letter writing to politicians with three little kids? Would I give up my time to spearhead an effort to enhance awareness? Selfishly, I wouldn't. I think most everyone is aware of the problems, for example, in Third World Africa, but very few people are doing anything about it. I give those people all my respect.

Even focusing closer to home, in Canada, doesn't change anything. Did you know that there are Native reservations that are comparable to Third World living conditions? Or the percentage of homeless people who are mentally ill is on the rise, due to the shut down of facilities for the mentally ill and the lack of public housing? Old folks starving to death because they can't afford to eat. I am not rushing out to raise the hue and cry. Why? Because it's not right in front of me. Or maybe it is, and I have the blinders on. I also think it's easier to say, 'It's the government's responsiblity to take care of it's people.' Which is true. We all pay taxes for roads and buildings and social safety nets designed to protect the most vulnerable of our population. Why does so much fall through the cracks? Not enough money, not enough social workers, not enough advocates, not enough time, not enough 'everything'.

I don't know if I'm way off base here, but it seems to me (based on what my mother told me) that years ago neighbors took care of each other. Someone checked on the old lady down the street once in a while, or watched a neighbor's kids in an emergency. Undoubtedly, said Good Samaritans immediately burned up the phone lines once they got back home to gossip about how that old lady's daughter never visited (tsk tsk) or the mother of those kids was a terrible housekeeper (for shame!). Kind of like a little social safety net. Of course, this doesn't even touch on the other stuff I mentioned; reservations and mentally ill folk. I think perhaps those are the government's responsiblities, but they must be kept at the forefront by the people. But not this person, apparently.

I am SO LUCKY to have this happy little life that I ought to pay it forward (karma-wise) somehow. No, I don't have time for petitioning, letter writing, picketing, organizing a protest, volunteering, advocating, etc. What do I have time for?

Thursday, April 23, 2009

My kid is so funny

4 Year old-speak to English translation:

froggy: foggy
ie. "It sure is froggy out today, hey mom?"

Vacuum-gone: Bakugon, a TV show
ie. "Mom, why can't I watch Vacuum-gone?"

stampulator: stapler
ie. "Mom, I need the stampulator to fix my Vacuum-gone necklace"

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


So I am a huge fan of MckMama and have been avidly following her blog and Twitter for updates on Stellan and family. Thankfully, Stellan has made it through his heart surgery and appears to be a happy little dude today, judging by the pictures. It's funny what we become obsessed about, isn't it? I have told my husband and all my friends about these virtual (literally) strangers, and kept them updated. My husband now asks me, "Did you check on your 4th child today?"

One of the things I like most about MckMama is her spirituality. My views are not the same as hers, but I greatly respect how passionate she is about her faith. MckMama wrote a post at Easter about the only path to Heaven, which is to believe that Jesus died on the cross and rose again three days later. Doesn't matter what you do or don't do here on earth, or what kind of person you are, good or bad, as long as you believe that Jesus died and came back, you will get to heaven. My burning question is this:

What is the point of being good?

If you are an axe-murderer serial killer, and you believe in Christ, you still get into heaven? No problem?

You live a good, honest life and you don't believe in Christ, you go to hell or hang out in limbo?

Doesn't sound right to me.

I just cannot believe this. I can't even get my mind to try this on for size. It goes against everything I feel about the balance of the universe, which is this: what you do comes back to you. Good or bad, you reap what you sow.

This is so stuck in my brain that I have been thinking about it quite a bit lately. Our own natural world shows us balance; just look at what happens when we mess with the balance of nature - everything is adversely affected, including ecosystems, bugs, animals, etc. I also believe that there is balance in each human being and mankind as a whole, but we are just too close to see it.

I think I need to think some more about this. Sometimes I feel like I am walking a rocky uphill path with this spirituality stuff. Or that I am separated from what I want to know by a fog and as soon as the fog clears, I will know what the heck I want to know.

Monday, April 13, 2009


If nothing is permanent, that means that everything is impermanent. Since nothing is permanent, then the state of impermanence cannot be permanent either. But impermanence cannot be impermanent, because at some point, things would have to become permanent. But nothing is permanent. Everything is impermanent. But not permanently. Or impermanently.

You dig?

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Judgement.. 'n stuff

So the coolest thing happened the other day. I got my 5 month old son's first giggles. It was.. awesome!! *ssssssiiiiggghhhhh* I have the biggest crush on my kids.

N E Ways, been thinking about the concept of judgement. Not in the biblical "God judgement" sense, but judgement from other people. I started thinking that judgement is really not about the judgee, but more about the judger. Makin sense, so far? Thought so. If someone thinks that I am not a good mother/wife/human being, what difference does it make to my life? None. They are not raising my kids/married to my husband/living my life. Judgement really is a grown up way to bully; putting other people down to feel superior. Why do grown ups judge? Because there is something lacking in them that they need to break others down in order to feel better about themselves. So really, it's not about the judgee, it's about the judger. Glad I took the time to think it through.

A couple of months ago, I was having some quiet grief time when my mind started to wander. There is nothing like the death of someone close to make you examine your own mortality. So, of course, I started thinking along the lines of, 'One day, I will no longer exist. I will no longer exist.' After that sparkling revelation, I had a moment of heart-seizing, breathless, skin-tingling terror. It felt like I got hit by an avalanche. It lasted maybe 30 seconds, which felt like a lifetime, until I could back away from that thought. Since then, I have been able to go back to it and examine it without the abject fear. Still not sure how I feel about it, except to say to myself, 'Self, everyone dies and you're not going to be any different. You won't care about being dead when you're dead, because you'll be dead.' Sometimes I am so deep.

I like to think that when you die, what you believed in life is what will be waiting for you. Christians will go to Heaven, Buddhists will be reincarnated, etc. Secretly, I think it's a blend of the two; you must be reincarnated until you learn all of life's lessons, then you get to go to Heaven. Heaven is a big giant library where you can learn the answers to all the questions in your lives that you didn't get answered. And you get to hang out with all the people you lost in your lives. I do believe in the 'judgement' part of life after death - either through "God judgement" or karma, everyone pays their dues.

On a cheerier note, tomorrow is Easter. Not being the Christian religious type, I only know that Christ was entombed then rose from the dead 3 days later. My Easter is about turkey and family and being so grateful for having my little people and hiding my 4 year old's Easter basket in a most excellent hiding spot. Boy, is he in for some hard work tomorrow!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Precious Moments

My sister decided to take the kids outside for some fun in the snow. I thought to myself, "Self, this is a good time to get your thoughts written down." I made it to the staircase and heard, "MOOOOOMMM, I can't find my other boot," yelled by the Hurricane. So, back to the mudroom I go to locate a boot. Then Mr. Mellow started fussing, so a few more minutes to settle him down and put him in the party dish (aka Exer-Saucer). Made it all the way up the stairs, and wait mmmm.. 4 or 5 hours for the computer to boot up, shut down (for fun, I assume) and re-boot. Next, I hear the Princess running through the house in her muddy and snowy boots. Fantastic. I don't have anything else to do but wash floors. Sister of mine gets the Princess back outside, and seconds later, I hear my sister yell up, "Can you pass me the Windex and some paper towels?!" What? You have GOT to be sh*tting me. Who cares about the outside of the windows at the beginning of spring? It's just going to rain. Now, I hear the Princess running through the house downstairs.


Giggling mischeviously.

Most likely wreaking havoc (what else is new? the house often looks like a bomb went off) and terrorizing her little brother.

I just wanted 15 minutes to talk to myself and maybe, FINALLY, pluck my eyebrow. It looks like two caterpillars fighting. Nevermind the loads of pre-vacation laundry. Or the packing. Or the double checking of The Vacation List. Looking less like a caveman is far more important.

Best sister ever.

My husband and I are travelling from this frozen wasteland to San Diego, CA on Friday. We are not taking ANY kids!! I am so excited. We are leaving our brood with my sister for 5 quiet, sleep-in as late as you want, do whatever you want, no-diaper changing, no refereeing, no crying, no fighting, no yelling, blissful days. It will be awesome. Especially since I seem to have gotten a bit of a head cold, what with the stuffy and runny nose (yes, stuffy and runny at the same time. Fantastic, isn't it?) and funky colored stuff coming out of it, and given to two of my kids. Score. Thank goodness I have the best sister ever.

So yesterday I had a moment. The moment when I realized that we were travelling to another country!! in three days and I hadn't even dug out our passports. Then I had another moment when I realized it was month end for our small business, and I hadn't even started that, let alone gotten to the point of cutting paycheques. This moment of clarity lead to hours of rushing around in a semi-panic cleaning, gathering, finding, computer working, and basically running around in a circle yelling "Fire!"

Really, it's a good thing my sister knows me so well. She kept the kids safely out of my warpath, and managed to keep them busy enough for me to actually get something done. She really is the best sister ever.