Brought to you by the written stylings of Julie @ Foursons.
Dear Preschool Fundraiser Moms:
Re: Ladies Night
Already I feel myself getting pulled into the drama. Why did I volunteer for this shit? Oh yeah, I'm a sucker!
At the meeting today, the three of us (did you other three even know about it?) made some decisions. The Spring Fling theme? Gone. The tea party idea that included tea pots and flower pots as centerpieces? Out the effing window. Lame, PG-rated entertainment? Not happening. It's called "Ladies Night" not "Ladies who don't believe in fun and prefer to be in bed by 8:00pm Night." So we came up with something better. Think: a classy, elegant Casino with proper hosts* and hostesses, and good entertainment. A hypnotist, some belly dancers, and a live band. Not to mention food, door prizes, raffles, and a silent auction. We know there will be women of all ages and tastes there. Some of them may think our casino is tacky. Some of them may be disappointed that they are not sitting under bright fluorescent lights oohing and aahing over the flowerpot centerpieces and (undoubtedly) giant ugly crepe-paper carnations adorning the tables. Hopefully enough of those women will get liquored up enough to make the hypnotist's show really awesome.
*"Hosts" will be played by half-dressed male strippers who are eager to take you into the back room and show you a good time.**
**And by 'good time' I mean the raffle prizes. Or do I?
Sure, you're gonna be upset when we have our next meeting and you see that we have changed the theme. You'll get over it. Nobody is gonna pay to attend what amounts to a Grandmother's Day tea.
See you at the next meeting! (Looking forward to the sparks flying!)
Stone
Oooh, what fun! Most of the preschool moms I know would want the stuffy not-fun kind of night.
ReplyDeleteBawahahahaha! See what happens when you skip out on the meeting? You must take pictures of the "good" Ladies Night so we can all see. Oh yeah, and take photos of the faces when the missing women learn that their grandma's tea party has been cancelled. That should be a priceless photo!
ReplyDeleteThanks for linking up!
Half-dressed male strippers? Nice! I agree with Foursons, you have to take pics! I'm kinda looking forward to hearing how the next meeting goes...
ReplyDeleteum I know you don't know me, but I'd sure like an invite. I promise to be on my best behaviour ... until I get to the back with your "hosts", then I can't be held responsible for anything I do to them, I mean for anything that happens ....
ReplyDeleteShoot, where do I sign up? 'Cause that sounds waaaay more fun than a tea party. Who even drinks tea anymore? Are they going to serve crustless cucumber sandwiches? I'd rather have a beer!
ReplyDeleteThat sounds WAY more fun than the tea pot party!
ReplyDelete