Letters of Intent, Friday Sep 24/09

Letters of Intent is brought to you by Julie @ Foursons. Skip on over to her site and don't forget to bring your white-out.

Dear Government of Alberta,

This letter is in regards to the recent Child Tax Benefit* and GST Credit* assessment notices you sent me. Both letters state that I am not eligible because of my total family net income for 2008. Just in case no one has told you, and your computers are on the fritz, I wanted to point out that it is now 2009.

If I am reading these rejection letters correctly, it says that you are going to base my eligibility for Child Tax (and therefore, daycare subsidy) and GST for this year on income that was earned last year. Please note, last year's money has already been spent. We irresponsibly frittered it away on things like food, clothing, and shelter. There isn't any of it left for this year.

Frankly, Gov't of AB, your assessment criteria sucks. In today's economy, the financial stability of the common family fluctuates on a month-to-month, sometimes week-to-week, basis. How can you base eligibility and/or financial need using data that was only accurate 9 months ago? Does it not make more sense to use current financial information; say, income over the last six months or so?

I draw your attention to 2009; as you can see from our payroll taxes submitted so far this year, our income is much closer to take a penny than leave a penny.

I believe that I am entitled to special treatment, as I consider myself quite a unique snowflake, here for a short time but making the world better everyday. You guys go right ahead and bend the rules for me; just base my daycare subsidy on family income for the last six months (instead of on family income for all of 2008) so I qualify, and I will stop being Princess Pissypants about the whole thing. I would very much like to go back to work part-time and bring in some money, but we can't afford daycare for three children.

If you are not prepared to give me daycare subsidy, I will still (grudgingly) accept Child Tax Benefit and GST Credit in the form of direct deposit to my bank account. Again, with the entirely reasonable assessment criteria I have suggested, I will qualify. My bank account will always be ready to receive your funds, should there be any left after everyone in the various levels of your government has charged enough hookers to their expense accounts and diverted enough taxpayer money to their personal slush funds.

I will not be holding my breath waiting for your response. Benefit re-assessments will be done next July, so I am sure I will be hearing from you next September.

Insincerely,

Stone Fox

*For my American friends, and also rich Canadian friends (bastards): child tax credit is a tax credit that the government pays monthly to families who qualify based on income and number of kids. GST credit is a monthly credit that the government pays to anybody who qualifies based on income. Amounts paid are dependent on income.