Take this job and love it.

I went back to work when my first son was only 2.5 months. (Don't stop me if you've heard this one before.) Not really back to work, but I had to finish nursing school so I didn't really have a choice. Technically, I was working for free. Yes, apparently slavery is still legal, but now they call it "practicum placement." I finished when he was 4 or 5 months old, and it just seemed natural to slide right into a job.

When my daughter was born, I took the first few months off, then started going back to work on Fridays only. It was kind of a nice balance, because I was already preggo again, but it gave me time to be a grown up with other grown ups, and do the job I love.

Little Dude is now 7 months old, and for the last few months I have been gearing up in my mind to go back to work. Only.. it's not going to happen. The cost of daycare for 3 kids is astronomical. Because my husband made "too much money" (HA! As if! There is no such thing, stupid Canada Revenue and stupid Alberta government) last year, we do not qualify for daycare. It does not matter that we are just making ends meet this year due to the screeching halt of the oil and gas industry.

I am still struggling with the concept that I will not be going back to nursing for the forseeable future. I love my job. I love the fact that, in a small way, I make a difference. I have had bad days at work before, but never a day so bad that I wanted to quit.

This is kind of late in coming (although I am one of those people who seem to be a few steps behind everyone else in learning these big facts of life), but I just realized that being a stay at home mom is a job, and I should treat it like a job. With a schedule and stuff. Not just willy-nilly the way I have been doing it until now. So far, though, I have come to the conclusion that being a stay at home mom is not as easy for me as going to work. (Big revelation coming...now!) I am just not that creative when it comes to finding fun stuff for my kids to do that also has a bit of learning thrown in. That doesn't cost much. Or is free. We live in the country so most activities require driving into the city. I would love to take my kids for walks where we live, but we live right on a secondary highway that has lots of big rig traffic.

Oh, woe is me.

We did just buy the kids a swing set that Hot Stuff and I are going to put together tomorrow, so that will keep them busy for.. 15 minutes. Until somebody falls off/gets pushed off/starts crying because the other kid is on the swing they want to use. That is, of course, assuming Hot Stuff and I actually manage to put the swing set together without bodily injury - either from the heavy pieces or each other. Assembling things is not one of our stronger Team Sports. Once you throw a fussy baby and two other kids "trying to help" and it pretty much becomes a 3-acre cage match.