Friday, December 4, 2009

Letters of Intent, Dec 4/09

Letters of Intent

Brought to you by the letters F-O-U-R-S-O-N-S.

Dear Tiger Woods,

I, for one, am not surprised that your wife took a golf club to your SUV.  What did you think would happen when you inevitably got busted for cheating? Haven't you ever heard of Miranda Lambert or Carrie Underwood? Woman are not just going to sit back and take this crappy treatment anymore.  You should be feeling damn lucky that it was only the SUV that got the business end of your club.  You know what amuses me the most? That you told a friend your wife went "all ghetto" on you.  Excuse me?  The woman who takes care of you and your kids and puts up with your enormous ego and then finds you cheating went "all ghetto" on you? QUEL. SURPRISE.  I would be getting "all axe-murderer" on you, myself.  It's funny how you accuse her of being ghetto when you're the one slinking around like some horny ghetto dog sniffing at all the females.

Oh yes.  You may be worth a billion dollars, but you are still a dog. I hope she takes your worthless ass for everything.  Oh, and nice role-modeling, by the way, I'm sure all the little boys who idolize you are taking notes. Cochon.


Stone Fox


  1. I heard that if they were to divorce now she'd get 3 million dollars. The longer they stay married the more money she gets. But 3 million would be plenty for me!

    Thanks for linking up!

  2. Amen sister!! Jack ***! Seriously they don't think they will get caught. I'd burn his stupid island down!

  3. He's such a moron. It had to take an enormous amount of strength for her not to beat HIM.

  4. ROFL! Love this! And besides Miranda and Carrie, let's not forget Lorraine Bobbitt- my hero!

  5. There is another side to the story. She could be a real piece of work. Who knows.

  6. Sorry dude... he cheated with not one, not two, not even three, but AT LEAST FOUR DIFFERENT skanky women!! Don't care about the other side of the story... he's a douche...

    As for the prenup, I heard that if she leaves him now, she gets 25 million but if she waits until they've been married for 10 years, she gets 60 million...(that's two more years of cheating, people, in case anyone's counting...)
    I hope she has some integrity and leaves his cheating ass NOW!!!

  7. Husband and his brother were just talking about this. I was mildly disgusted that while they were not supportive of Tiger Woods for philandering, it was because the chicks he cheated with were NOT HOTTER than his wife Elin.

    Their exact words were along the lines of, "In America you're judged by how much hotter your mistress is than your wife. Tiger's ho is not hot."

    They both got my stink eye, and said, "Um, not that we think cheating is ok. Cuz it's not."

  8. PS that's a fantastic interview over at temerity jane.


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